“The Matrix is a system Neo. That system is our enemy, but when you’re inside, what do you see, business men, teachers, lawyers, carpenters. The very minds of the people we are trying to save, but until we do these people are a part of that system, and that makes them our enemy. Most of these people are not ready to be unplugged, and many of them are so inert, so hopelessly dependent on the system, that they will fight to protect it.”
– Morpheus, Matrix
Last night we had a big discussion with Alex about Facebook… It made me think a lot about my use of the site. It was nothing new though. Alex has been frowning upon the whole trend of Facebook for months now. Huh, frowning upon is an understatement actually. She hasn’t missed a single chance to express how much she hates it and how it should not exist at all.
Now, I’m not a particularly heavy Facebook user but the past few weeks I’ve been logging in more and more. The Kinimatografiki Symmoria and organizing it has played a role in this but there are just so many new people I’ve met recently that checking up with them seems natural.
Well, Alex argued last night that Facebook does not fulfil any real needs. It only creates more and more needs that revolve around itself. Basically, she said that time spent on Facebook is 100% wasted: the only activities one engages in are voyeurism and pseudo-socialising with few “real-world” implications. “Why should anyone have a Facebook account?”, she pondered. “It’s just for self-promoting of the worst kind, I cannot see how it might be useful in any other way.” We argued for hours. I said that Facebook has become an integral part of one’s web identity and that it has become as necessary and versatile as a “real” mobile phone in some cases. I told her that my recent spark of interest was purely functional.
Deep down though, I knew that she was right. She had a point, at least. OK, Facebook is useful for managing groups and events. But apart from that? One creates photos for them to be seen, oggled, admired. One creates the perfect representation that most often comes from a mold of familiar shape. One exposes everything to his or her circle of imaginary friends… “Would you shed a single tear if any of these damn friends of yours died?? Would they ever call you to tell you their problems? Would they?!”, said Alex screaming almost but trying not to wake up my mother. It was late you see.
“They’re contacts, not friends.” I told her. “At least, most of them are contacts, but there’s friends in there as well, people I meet in my everyday life.” -“Do you need to contact them through Facebook? Is this the kind of communication you want?” -“No, but you cannot deny the usefulness of having your entire cirlce of friends within your digital reach.” -“Isn’t this what MSN is for? Can’t you send them an e-mail? How many people actually register on Facebook so that they can speak with their friends? Few, if any. Most just want to show off their entirely simulative representation which often has little connection with reality, find chicks or boys, create a circle of friends so that they can have the impression of being a part of something. Well, it’s not like this. If a group of friends decides to do something and forgets about me because I’m not on Facebook, therefore I’m not in, I won’t care. I do not want to be a part of anything that might resemble this. It sickens me!”
“Weeell… I understand what you’re saying but it’s not necessarily like this. I can do without my Facebook”.
-“Oh yeah? Delete it. Tomorrow. You can’t.”
-“I can! It’s not that I can’t, I don’t want to (that sounds very… not addicted, doesn’t it?). I mean, I’m using it everyday and I need to manage the Kinimatografiki through it. I would delete it if I didn’t need it as a basic means of representation on the world’s biggest social network. It’s part of my studies and field, after all.”
-“If you really wanted to quit it, you would have when you deleted all your photos and put that kangaroo as your profile pic. That was a nice middle finger. But no, you stayed. Something kept you in it. And now you’re hooked again. You just can’t do away with checking girls’ profiles, can you? You want to be seen.”
-“…”
-“Have you even thought of how much idle time you, everyone you know, and everyone you don’t know, spend on Facebook? Doing nothing productive, just having the impression that you’re socialising, when you’re only there sitting in front of a computer, writing comments on pics, not because you really mean to comment on them, but becase you want everybody else to see that you made the comments. Do you really think anyone cares about what you have to say on Facebook? I mean anyone who wouldn’t sit and listen to what you have to say in real life?”
-“…”
Long story short… I realised yesterday that when presented with the dilemma of deleting my Facebook profile or not, a profile on a site that isn’t really all that important for me, I couldn’t press myself to do it. I was making excuses, I could see this much. But as Alex was quick to point out, it was showing signs that it was controlling me and that I wasn’t fully able to control it. Keeping my Facebook use to the bare-minimum, would I truly be able to control the urge to play around with it, look at pictures, use applications, make my profile look good? Even if I get outside it, people still inside it might look for me. And then?
The whole question concerns the whole world wide web (WWWW), especially now that everyone has a voice and anyone can speak. Now that blogs are a force majeure. Is the “System” just Facebook, or does escaping mean abandoning the web altogether? If not, what constitutes being outside, or for that matter, inside the System, especially when everything is linked? Such questions might prove to be very intriguing, not to mention crucial, in the following years.
After much thought I decided not to delete my Facebook account altogether, even if such a move would be brave indeed. I’ll hide behind my excuses of responsibility but I’ll delete my pics as I had done a few months ago…
And I shall ask you:
“Would you fight to protect the System?”
Bonus thought-provoking:
Mr. Anderson… welcome back!
Δεν έχω να προσθέσω βασικά κάτι άλλο, εκτος του ότι εννοείται, πως όλο το “πρόβλημα” Facebook δεν είναι παρά σύμπτωμα μιας γενικότερης, ανησυχητικής και σάπιας τάσης της κοινωνίας να χάνει το χρόνο της καίγοντας εγκεφαλικά κύτταρα, αγνοόντας πραγματικές εμπειρίες, γνώση, αναζήτηση, περιπέτεια, και φυσικά την αξία και τη βαρύτητα κάθε στιγμής που παραμένουμε ζωντανοί.
Γι’αυτούς οι οποίοι *επιλέγουν* να καίνε τον εγκέφαλό τους, για τα άτομα τα οποία θα μπορούσαν πραγματικά ανά πάσα στιγμή να δικόψουν κάθε δραστηριότητα καύσης (η ενασχόληση με Facebook συμπεριλαμβάνεται σε αυτές) και δεν το κάνουν γιατί με όλη την ελευθερία βουλησής τους *διαλέγουν* να εξαχνώσουν όλη τη φαιά τους ουσία, όπως και για τα άτομα τα οποία δεδομένου τραυματικών φροϋδικών εμπειριών έχουν βίτσιο με το να τους ελεγχουν κάθε πτυχή των εγκεφαλικών τους λειτουργιών, οπότε why not? let’s get fucked by the wolrd wide web!, σ’αυτά τα άτομα βγάζω καπέλο και ζιπάρω το υπερλαλήσαν στόμα μου.
“It’s just for self-promoting of the worst kind, I cannot see how it might be useful in any other way.”
So, I heard you have your own blog now, eh Alex?
Also QB, both you and Alex are forgetting the reason social networking started and it’s benefits. How else will I keep in contact with people I met in my travels? I want to keep in contact with them, in hopes of seeing the again one day (as it happened with Jana (and will happen again) and others I’m still planning to meet).
Interesting argument though.
Now if you’ll excuse me I’ll go drool over bikini pics of a few of my “contacts”…
P.S. : My new Camera just arrived!!!
P.P.S. : My wacom is awesome.
P.P.S. : Pairnei html sta comments edw?
*add to previous comment:*
Don’t forget the “public portfolio” uses of social networking. It’s pretty basic but it helps project you skills and work. Alex’s hate against fb seems more and more unjustified and unreasonable the more I think about your post…
Mordread. Go drool over your contact’s bikini photo’s and let others do the serious thinking. You said it yourself! “Public portfolio”? “Social networking”? “Projecting skills and work”? “Keeping contact with people”? FFS! NO!!! DUUUH?
BIKINI PHOTOS FTW!!! Facebook would only be more… perfect if it had porn in it. More perfect and definitely a lot more sincere as to what its main reason of excistance is…
Just saying. Everyone has his own way of surfing.
basika, opws exw hdh pei, einai pws to blepei o ka8enas to facebook.mporei na einai apo ergaleio ergasias ( mono gia emas tou online advertising), mexri sobaro kapsimo egkefalou.
h alh8eia brisketai kapou sth mesh..
I like arguing,I don’t love facebook so I m not really keen on defending it but… DAMN you for forcing me.
So, I ll try to counter the points I think Alex made (in quotes).
“Facebook does not fulfil any real needs. It only creates more and more needs that revolve around itself”
The way I see it, real needs are all needs that,well…exist. Need is anything you feel you want to satisfy.Sure, facebook is not as important as eating or sleeping but if satisfying it makes you feel better, I dont see why it wouldn’t costitute a need.Again yes,if you weren’t already in facebook you wouldnt need to check it every day but then I wouldn’t buy a camera bag if I didn’t have a camera.
“Basically, she said that time spent on Facebook is 100% wasted: the only activities one engages in are voyeurism and pseudo-socialising with few “real-world” implications.”
Again with the “real-world”. What makes Facebook not-real? Now, about it being a 100% waste of time.Is doodling on a tablecloth a waste? What about the little games and quizzes (that I HATE) on fb, why are those a waste of time?
And why is voyerism and pseudo-socialising a waste of time? Who should judge when time is wasted and when its productive?
“Would you shed a single tear if any of these damn friends of yours died?? Would they ever call you to tell you their problems? Would they?!”
Would you shed a tear for EVERY SINGLE one of your “real-world” aquaintances died? Does everyone you know in the real world call to tell you their problems?
Nope, they don’t. Some do. Same goes for facebook.
-”Oh yeah? Delete it. Tomorrow. You can’t.”
-”I can! It’s not that I can’t, I don’t want to (that sounds very… not addicted, doesn’t it?).
No It doesn’t sound addicted at all. I hear that a lot on the subject of World of Warcraft. There IS a difference between not able and not willing. I don’t have to deny everything I enjoy just to “prove” I m not addicted to it.
Anyway, just to wrap it up, its already longer than what I had in mind, I think Alex wanted to hate facebook and came up with the reasons not to like it afterwards. Almost all she said can be applied to television, the internet in general or videogames.
I really doubt fb is anything more than a trend. Soon we will all be living in our own private worlds, chatting with AI controlled characters in our own pink-fluid filled cocoons. Unless I m already in…..wait.
“The way I see it, real needs are all needs that,well…exist. Need is anything you feel you want to satisfy.Sure, facebook is not as important as eating or sleeping but if satisfying it makes you feel better, I dont see why it wouldn’t costitute a need.Again yes,if you weren’t already in facebook you wouldnt need to check it every day but then I wouldn’t buy a camera bag if I didn’t have a camera.”
Since the main point here is time and how it is spent, more and more different needs mean more and more scattering of energy. You know how it goes — you want to do more and more as the years go by. Why spend some of this limited time on Facebook when you don’t REALLY want it but you just think you want it, when it rewards you with less than what you think it does? Things that always connect to the “real world” somehow. What done on Facebook has any meaning whatsoever if you take it out of context of the real world? That is not the case with WoW, for example. Its world theoretically exists parallel to ours, only its players knowing that it is actually a world within a world. Facebook’s purpose is to be a world within a world.
“Would you shed a tear for EVERY SINGLE one of your “real-world” aquaintances died? Does everyone you know in the real world call to tell you their problems?
Nope, they don’t. Some do. Same goes for facebook. ”
Facebook treats your contacts and your friends on equal ground. It does not say “here are you friends, here are your acquaintances, here are the people you would die for”. Everyone is on a peculiar equilibrium that only makes it easier for you to feel more connected with someone you might occasionally wave at on the street. This virtual equality does not exist in real life. You wave at some people, you speak at some others, you hang out with others, you share your secrets with fewer. You, and I mean you, Garret, like to keep your mobile phone list short, and the same goes for your friends list on FB. That is not the case for most people though, including myself, for whom a single glance or nod in afterthought is enough for making or accepting a friend request. It is not the intended use of Facebook. The bond you share with these people is strange then. They have the same access to your pics, notes, posts etc as everyone. You would not shed a tear for these people, sure, but in real life, just for someone to be your acquaintance would not justify your even feeling sad for them, let alone shed a tear. On FB, you’re friends. Whatever that means in the end.
I remember this incident when an old schoolmate of mine died in an accident. I went to his funeral but held a low key — this person meant little for me if you exclude any memories I had of him from primary school. Something that would mean little for him today, in a conscious way at least. On his FB, after his death, most of his friends posted stuff as condolence and I doubt whether 1 out of 3 of them went to the funeral.
Or what about the people with thousands of friends? Don’t you think they are the loneliest of all?
“No It doesn’t sound addicted at all. I hear that a lot on the subject of World of Warcraft. There IS a difference between not able and not willing. I don’t have to deny everything I enjoy just to “prove” I m not addicted to it.”
Facebook makes you think it is important and that you’re going to miss something if you let it go. Something that is meant to be there just as a convenience, mind you. More often than not, when you are unwilling to let go of something you are emotionally and/or psychologically bonded with it. You don’t want to give up playing WoW. For you, it’s more than just a good way to pass your time. It’s a community, it’s a lore. You feel that you’d betray all that if you abandoned WoW, wouldn’t you? It’s just a piece of software with many people playing it though, what exactly would you be betraying? Fb is not much different: abandoning FB is abandoning your friends — especially if you try to deactivate your account. Oh they really don’t like it when you do that.
Of course you don’t need to deny everything just to prove you don’t need it. But trying to think yourself without the things you enjoy can help determining how much control you have over them or whether the reverse is true. If you’re trying to avoid the question, especially when it concerns something that you only mildly enjoy, something is definitely wrong.
The nature of it altogether is such that it now functions like what I can imagine as a sort of meta-reality. It all works in a way that makes you think that if you abandon it you’re going to exist slightly less, your person suddenly becoming a bit less meaningful. Isn’t this an absurd thought?
Cubi, here here! for that last sentence! Garret, you think i just hated fb and *then* i came up with reasons to hate it? You must think i’m really stupid, right? For your information, i dind’t hate fb beacause I had nothing better to do with my brain you know. I started hating fb when i first found out that you can make your friends “pets” of yours. That really pushed all of my buttons and ever since they remain pushed. Make “pets” out of people? And then i observed how much time cubi spent on fb, there was no chance he would have his pc turned on without opening at least 10 fb tabs. But at the same time he complained about having very little time to do all the stuff he wanted! Then, i was really disgusted with people i knew with mobiles that could connect to the net, who checked their fb account every 5 minutes! Then, there were members of my family, totaly without social life, that spent like 5 hours each day playing this farm thing! Wanna more? I got more! But as you said, this post is getting too long.
One last thing. Before acusing me of claiming stuff just for fun, or because “etsi mou kavlwse mia wraia mera”, you might want to look a bit into that obsesion of yours to oppose to an oppinion, just for the sake of opposition… “I myself don’t like fb, but i’m going to defend it just because alex accuses it”.. Ap’oti fainetai kapoianou allou tou kavlwse mia wraia mera.. :/
Alex, chill. We all know that Garret likes arguing, it’s the first thing he admits in his comment. But how is it different, as Garret puts it, to videogames and television? Maybe it’s the people, and not the ‘book, as we had said in our original discussion.
“Maybe it’s the people, and not the ‘book, as we had said in our original discussion.” Kudos to QB for that and to Garret’s. Kudos removed from Alex for flaming on the net.
You can make “pets” out of people? Umm… so… what? You can KILL your friends in almost every single multiplayer game, I don’t know about you but killing your friends sounds a tad more disturbing than making pets of them.
And I am sure Cubi was spending a lot of time on many many other things besides fb and yet you singled out fb as being the time wasting activity, thats why I say that you pick your targets before finding reasons to hate them, yea I could be wrong and if you say you don’t I have no reason to doubt you, but still, thats the vibe I got when I read your arguements.
You might be really disgusted with people checking their mobile fb accounts every 5 minutes, but you give no actual non-subjective reason why such a thing is disgusting.
As for me and my obsession to oppose an opinion, its just a motive. As long as my arguements hold water, my motives shouldnt concern you.
Great post! Thanks for the link and the comments on my blog! I have to say, I agree with Alex wholeheartedly and she had some excellent and well-reasoned points, many of which I have thought about also.
I became engaged a few months ago, and I decided that I wanted to call all of my friends on the phone so that as many of them as possible found out from me rather than from the internet or from other friends. One of my friend’s reactions when I called her and told her? “Oh man. Molly, my first thought was actually ‘what? Facebook didn’t tell me that!’ ” At least she knew how insane that was. I choose my friends semi-wisely. 🙂
Sometimes I do have the distinct feeling that there is a big facebook club out there which I am not a part of (particularly when people say things like, ‘well if you were on Facebook you would know that…’ But I also like belonging to an even more elite club: The non-facebookers.
I was very happy to see that you followed the link and actually read my post and even replied! Thanks for your interest, Molly. 🙂
I wrote a new post a few minutes ago linking to a couple of relevant texts… One of them was yours. It is a sort of addition to Abandoning the System!
A thought Alex had that I have not mentioned is this: how dangerous may it soon be to consciously abstain from having a facebook account? I mean, if you willingly deny divulging your personal details and refuse to get into the whole farce it all really is… In an era when facebook is going to be even more important than having a mobile phone, not maintaining a facebook account might make you a “suspect”, if you know what I’m saying. It will automatically mean you are a member of this elite club.