Best of G.I. Joe PSAs

This one brings back sooo many memories from high-school and my friends! We used to download these videos from Ebaum’s world with my 64K ISDN, almost die laughing, take videos of the videos with our mobile phones and then re-enact them in class. Ah, good times! And this video is a compilation of them all!

Enjoy. And always remember: you might wake up the next day and be on fire.

Review: Το άρωμα

Το άρωμα  Το άρωμα by Patrick Süskind

My rating: 4 of 5 stars

I found my copy of The Perfume (Το Άρωμα in greek, I read it in its greek translation, the 1987 edition) in a used bookstore and got it for only €4. It was some of my best spent money of the holidays!

Jean-Baptiste Grenouille is one of the fantasy characters sitting most cozily in what we’d call a moral grey zone. He’s barely human, really, his traits strange indeed, bringing to mind an extreme, sick but interesting result coming right out of an RPG’s character creation menu. His complete lack of charisma is balanced-off (or perhaps, induced) by his survival skills and, most notably, his LEGENDARY sense of smell. This isn’t your ordinary person that can connect memories with scents. Grenouille’s smelling capabilities are so exquisite, his other senses almost reach the point of atrophy.

Throw this character smack bang in the middle of 18th century France, with all its perfumes and the art and science of their creation, flowers, stink, human waste, the almost complete lack of bathing, aristocracy, Enlightenment and pseudo-enlightenment (not claiming I can tell the two apart) rural landscapes, and you’ve got yourself this great book.

I did lose myself in some of the scents described in The Perfume, marveling at the sheer power of the most underused and underestimated of the Five Senses, the one whose true strength seldom ever enters the realm of true human consciousness, instead pulling the metal strings from below, connecting with parts of our brain that have evolved little since the time our reptilian ancestors ruled the Earth. I can relate to a certain scent bringing back powerful memories, but for Grenouille, the scent was the purpose. He isolated it from any and all connotations: that was the only way he could see, excuse me, smell the world, everything else was secondary or irrelevant. It is really hard to describe how striking the smell of a tannery or of Paris’s cesspools (if they even existed) must have been, or, one the other end of the spectrum, what the girls’ perfume or the many different precise recipes as perceived by him might have been. But that’s the good thing about books, that’s where they win over other media. Merely imagining the scents, the odours, the stench, the perfumes, comparing it with one’s own (de facto and comparitively little) experience is enough to set the scene.

The historical background, even if not entirely accurate, is a very pleasant and convincing addition. I really had the chance to imagine a pretty clear picture of life in a small town in 1760s France, and even better, what an effect on this community a man with powers such as Grenouille would have. What I also felt was a prominent theme was of how little importance human life was at the time. Many, many characters just die, almost as an easy way for the writer to not have to mention them again.

That said, the book’s chief focus is (perhaps somewhat disappointingly) not the social effects of the protagonist’s power, even if that scope would have been awesome indeed. No, we, the readers, have a good look at Grenouille’s life and how it must have been for him instead. The look at the one-sidedness of his existence is quite uncanny at times. At the very end, we do not see the full extent of what an influence Grenouille could have on the entire world, which is something I would have liked to read about, how far his gift, malice and unique way of seeing the world could have taken him. But the ending is satisfyingly shocking and apt. No complaints!

I finished The Perfume in just two days. It’s a smell, I mean, small book so you can do much worse than giving it a whiff. It far, far from stinks! Yes, and now there are hints of cheese wafting around. Mmm, cheese…

View all my reviews

Automatically posted from my Goodreads profile. This is just a test for Goodreads-Wordpress connectivity. Doesn’t look bad, does it? 🙂

Google Blacklist – Words That Google Instant Doesn’t Like

Have you noticed that when you type something in on Google, suggestions come out? It’s pretty fun typing in “how do I”, “is it normal/bad/weird”, “can I” etc, etc, in Greek as well!

If you type in certain words, though, nothing will come out… *spooky sound fx*

What are these words, you ask? Click here and find out… And then we’ll talk about whether or not web censorship is swiftly becoming a reality or not.

Nuclear Terrorist Attack: New Survival Guidelines

http://news.gather.com/viewArticle.action?articleId=281474978801640

No comments, really…

For the actual guidelines:

http://hps.org/hsc/documents/Planning_Guidance_for_Response_to_a_Nuclear_Detonation-2nd_Edition_FINAL.pdf

Drown With Me

Unfortunately the only proper version of the song on Youtube is the one off We Lost the Skyline, which is OK, but just that. For the definitive, full band version I’ve come to love (the one from the In Absentia B-Sides), click here. You won’t regret it!

According to my last.fm page, I’ve listened to this song 30 times in the past few weeks. That sounds like an underestimation.

So you have been of use
And you have been abused

You know you look pale today
Your lipstick has gone astray

You sold out and lost your looks
You gave away all your books

(You should drown with me)

Your coil has been wound up tight
Unwind it with me tonight

(You should drown with me)

Tyre tracks Fresh on the ground
Where she will be found
Held under the water
Resting there in a stream
View from the cold water
Buried in green
Orange filter sky

Your drowning in family there
When will you come up for air

(You should drown with me)

Don’t feel you let ’em down
Cos they have already drowned

(You should drown with me)

Strange Maps: Map of the World’s Countries Rearranged by Population

Look at this piece of brilliance!


What if the world were rearranged so that the inhabitants of the country with the largest population would move to the country with the largest area? And the second-largest population would migrate to the second-largest country, and so on?

The result would be this disconcerting, disorienting map. In the world described by it, the differences in population density between countries would be less extreme than they are today. The world’s most densely populated country currently is Monaco, with 43,830 inhabitants/mi² (16,923 per km²) (1). On the other end of the scale is Mongolia, which is less densely populated by a factor of almost exactly 10,000, with a mere 4.4 inhabitants/mi² (1.7 per km²).

The averages per country would more closely resemble the global average of 34 per mi² (13 per km²). But those evened-out statistics would describe a very strange world indeed. The global population realignment would involve massive migrations, lead to a heap of painful demotions and triumphant promotions, and produce a few very weird new neighbourhoods.

Take the world’s largest country: Russia. It would be taken over by its Asian neighbour and rival China, the country with the world’s largest population. Overcrowded China would not just occupy underpopulated Siberia – a long-time Russian fear – but also fan out all the way across the Urals to Russia’s westernmost borders. China would thus become a major European power. Russia itself would be relegated to Kazakhstan, which still is the largest landlocked country in the world, but with few hopes of a role on the world stage commensurate with Russia’s clout, which in no small part derives from its sheer size.

Canada, the world’s second-largest country, would be transformed into an Arctic, or at least quite chilly version of India, the country with the world’s second-largest population. The country would no longer be a thinly populated northern afterthought of the US. The billion Indians north of the Great Lakes would make Canada a very distinct, very powerful global player.

Strangely enough, the US itself would not have to swap its population with another country. With 310 million inhabitants, it is the third most populous nation in the world. And with an area of just over 3.7 million mi² (slightly more than 9.6 million km²), it is also the world’s third largest country (2). Brazil, at number five in both lists, is in the same situation. Other non-movers are Yemen and Ireland. Every other country moves house. A few interesting swaps:

* Countries with relatively high population densities move to more spacious environments. This increases their visibility. Look at those 94 million Filipinos, for example, no longer confined to that small archipelago just south of China. They now occupy the sprawling Democratic Republic of the Congo, the 12th largest country in the world, and slap bang in the middle of Africa too.
* The reverse is also true. Mongolia, that large, sparsely populated chunk of a country between Russia and China, is relegated to tiny Belgium, whose even tinier neighbour Luxembourg is populated by 320,000 Icelanders, no longer enjoying the instant recognition provided by their distinctly shaped North Atlantic island home.
* Australia’s 22.5 million inhabitants would move to Spain, the world’s 51st largest country. This would probably be the furthest migration, as both countries are almost exactly antipodean to each other. But Australians would not have to adapt too much to the mainly hot and dry Spanish climate.
* But spare a thought for those unfortunate Vietnamese. Used to a lush, tropical climate, the 85 million inhabitants of Vietnam would be shipped off to icy Greenland. Even though that Arctic dependency of Denmark has warmed up a bit due to recent climate changes, it would still be mainly snowy, empty and freezing. One imagines a giant group huddle, just to keep warm.
* Jamaica would still be island-shaped – but landlocked, as the Jamaicans would move to Lesotho, an independent enclave completely surrounded by South Africa – or rather, in this strange new world, South Korea. Those South Koreans probably couldn’t believe their bad luck. Of all the potential new friends in the world, who gets to be their northern neighbour but their wacky cousin, North Korea? It seems the heavily militarised DMZ will move from the Korean peninsula to the South African-Botswanan border.
* The UK migrates from its strategically advantageous island position off Europe’s western edge to a place smack in the middle of the Sahara desert, to one of those countries the name of which one always has to look up (3). No longer splendidly isolated, it will have to share the neighbourhood with such upstarts as Mexico, Myanmar, Thailand and – good heavens – Iran. Back home, its sceptered isles are taken over by the Tunisians. Even Enoch Powell didn’t see that one coming.
* Some countries only move a few doors down, so to speak. El Salvador gets Guatemala, Honduras takes over Nicaragua, Nepal occupies Birma/Myanmar and Turkey sets up house in Iran. Others wake up in a whole new environment. Dusty, landlocked Central African Republic is moving to the luscious island of Sri Lanka, with its pristine, ocean-lapped shores. The mountain-dwelling Swiss will have to adapt to life in the flood-infested river delta of Bangladesh.
* Geography, they say, is destiny (4). Some countries are plagued or blessed by their present location. How would they fare elsewhere? Take Iraq, brought down by wars both of the civil and the other kind, and burdened with enough oil to finance lavish dictatorships and arouse the avidity of superpowers. What if the 31.5 million Iraqis moved to the somewhat larger, equally sunny country of Zambia – getting a lot of nice, non-threatening neighbours in the process?

Rearranged maps that switch the labels of the countries depicted, as if in some parlour game, to represent some type of statistical data, are an interesting subcategory of curious cartography. The most popular example discussed on this blog is the map of the US, with the states’ names replaced by that of countries with an equivalent GDP (see #131). Somewhat related, if by topic rather than technique, is the cartogram discussed in blog post #96, showing the world’s countries shrunk or inflated to reflect the size of their population.

Many thanks to all who sent in this map: Matt Chisholm, Criggie, Roel Damiaans, Sebastian Dinjens, Irwin Hébert, Allard H., Olivier Muzerelle, Rodrigo Oliva, Rich Sturges, and John Thorne. The map is referenced on half a dozen websites where it can be seen in full resolution (this one among them), but it is unclear where it first originated, and who produced it (the map is signed, in the bottom right hand corner, by JPALMZ).

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(1) Most (dependent) territories and countries in the top 20 of Wikipedia’s population density ranking have tiny areas, with populations that are, in relation to those of other countries, quite negligeable. The first country on the list with both a substantial surface and population is Bangladesh, in 9th place with a total population of over 162 million and a density of 1,126 inhabitants/mi² (56 per km²).

(2) Actually, the US contends third place with China. Both countries have almost the same size, and varying definitions of how large they are. Depending on whether or not you include Taiwan and (other) disputed areas in China, and overseas territories in the US, either country can be third of fourth on the list.

(3) Niger, not to be confused with nearby Nigeria. Nor with neighbouring Burkina Faso, which used to be Upper Volta (even though there never was a Lower Volta except, perhaps, Niger. Or Nigeria).

(4) The same is said of demography. And of a bunch of other stuff.

Source: Strange Maps, one of the best weird but so special blogs out there and one of my obvious favourites! 🙂